Are you finding you get distressed easily?
Feeling frustrated or maybe even angry?
In the hectic pace of our lives, with so many things going on, it is easier to get distressed over things not going as we would like them to. There is just so much happening and so little “me” time to let it process and settle.
Here is an idea to think about. If we can take out some time to reflect on what is distressing us we can better understand those stressors, ourselves, and be able to decide if this is worth stressing over or is it better to move on. This is in addition to the immediate benefit of slowing things down and pausing the constant stimulation, while we are taking out the time to reflect.
Aaron was frequently upset at his boss. When he came to discuss it over he was at wits end. There was a lot of pent up anger which he couldn’t express to his boss, so it bottled up inside of him. Well, upon reflection he realized he never actually liked any boss he had had, and probably wouldn’t be able to like any other boss he would have. Due to his nature of being unable to take orders from others and his need to be in control, he realized that the boss is not the bad guy after all, the issue lies inside of him.
This realization has the ability to be very healing in Aaron’s relationship with his boss, for next time he gets frustrated he can take a moment and reflect, “I don’t like bosses, I don’t do well when others lead me.” The feelings can be inner reflections as opposed to distress and anger. The next step over time is to either accept that reality that he will need to have a boss, which will lead him to ultimately stop fighting it. Or he can choose to move on and be enterprising and start his own business. These choices are only possible once he takes stock and focuses.
What is distressing you in your life? Maybe you can take the time to reflect. Maybe you can notice a pattern or trend that is coming up. Knowing the problem is half the solution. Being willing to reflect on the problem is a very big part as well.
Adirwellness.com With offices in Monsey, NY and in Waterbury CT. Sessions on telehealth as well.
